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1The Yatogami Clan~! Empty The Yatogami Clan~! Wed Dec 17, 2014 4:43 am

Shinya

Shinya


D-rank

The Yatogami Clan~! 55568110

Clan: Yatogami


Kekkei Genkai: Swordsman's Sixth Sense[AKA: SSS]


Elements: [player's choice]


Specialization: [Player's choice/Bukijutsu advised]


Location: Scattered[Tsukigakure]


Clan History:



Kekkei Genkai Description:

The clansmen were always the talk of the greatest clans in all eras and generations, not only does this clan hail from the earliest moments in the history of all shinobi, but their powers made them all the more popular, and not only their powers shone the light on them but their ability to age many many more years than a normal human, their record was set on 300 years, but their semi-Imortality is nothing compared to their passive abilities, they've been known for their abilities to age to an insane amount of year, but not for their true powers.

Plot: They are capable of sharing their past with people, in order to explain situations easier, they may only look into the eyes of the person, to flash those memories into their heads.

The clans greatest power lies in their motion detecting ability, while people need to utilize their chakra or bring out their chakra these shinobi need nothing of the like. Many people that encountered them described being around them as something difficult due to the pressure around them, that reason is easily explained; their chakra roams around them in an area of ten meters radius, that area allows them to detect any type of movement  as if a huge blanket covers the area of 10 meters around them(radius). Whenever anything moves they detect it with ease and in doing so  
they are capable of sensing movement as it happens, and attacks as they occur, and the location of a moving target. The range of this ability(10 meters radius) increases by 5 at each rank higher than genin, and can also be lengthened by paying 20 chakra for an extra ten meters.(This ability only detects/senses physical objects/forms)

Clansmen are masters of physical art; when dealing with taijutsu and any melee-only weapons, whether using or defending against, they gain one tier in reaction time.


Drawbacks:


While they are capable of sensing physical movement, they're completely incapable of sensing still objects/bodies, or of sensing chakra techniques that do not host a physical body, rendering them vulnerable to them, in fact, Ninjutsu deals +1 damage against them, any type of attack that hosts no physical structure is capable of  cutting through the sensory with not much of an effort, in fact with no effort at all.


Stealth techniques of a higher rank or of an equal rank can hide from the user, they  are quite bothersome to the clansmen, even with their aura of detection they can't sense them.

They find Kugutsu to be a horrid specialization, they decline it and react terribly to it, receiving -1 to reaction time when dealing with them.

Not only is that Kugutsu an annoying insect to them, but Ninjutsu is also hard to follow for them striking them with a -1 in reaction time when dealing with it.

Clansmen always favored fuuton techniques over anything else, but never favored it when it's put against them, their sensory detects the motion an opponent's fuuton jutsu puts into the air almost too well, rendering it useless for a number of posts after the jutsu is cast.



D-Rank Fuuton: 1 Post cooldown

C-Rank Fuuton: 2 Post cooldown

B-Rank Fuuton: 4 Post cooldown

A-Rank Fuuton: 7 Post cooldown

S-Rank Fuuton: 10post cooldown

SS-Rank Fuuton: You're probably dead anyway (15 posts cooldown)


You also MUST take this SC for anyone planning on joining the clan
(without balancing it):



Name: Foolish Spender
Type: Negative
Description: This individual is so bad when it comes to money, that it's actually funny, they waste their time AND money on the pachinko, and they hate taking alot of money from jobs they do, thus, the losers receive -10% from all mission, they also have to pay 10% more for all equipment(don't try to be smart and take haggler it's not allowed.)

SC Coding:
Code:
[b]Name:[/b] Foolish Spender
[b]Type:[/b] Negative
[b]Description:[/b] This individual is so bad when it comes to money, that it's actually funny, they waste their time AND money on the pachinko, and they hate taking alot of money from jobs they do, thus, the losers receive -10% from all mission, they also have to pay 10% more for all equipment(don't try to be smart and take haggler it's not allowed.)




Members:
Shinya Yatogami





Kekkei Genkai Jutsu:



Swordsman glare:




Prisoner's Plea:




Swordsman's Plea:




Secret Style:



Last edited by Shinya on Fri Apr 24, 2015 3:30 am; edited 28 times in total

2The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Sun Dec 28, 2014 9:07 am

Shinya

Shinya


D-rank
ummm this clan is still going through so work but can a mod please check the abilities and drawbacks, a few suggestions would be great, thanks for the help

3The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Sun Dec 28, 2014 3:36 pm

Noriko

Noriko


D-rank
You need to give a Kekkei Genkai name.

Your elements and Specializations would probably be Raiton/Fuuton and Bukijutsu, respectively. Just from looking at what you have for drawbacks and jutsu.

Motion Sensing (passive): 15m at Genin is already like having a D-rank sensory jutsu active at all times. For these kinds of things, we usually require a max chakra pool reduction. (You can reduce the range and it would be OK as passive. 5m is usually the threshold for this.) However, I don't like movement prediction. It's something only the Uchiha have (part of the reason why they're a limited clan).

Drawbacks: Space out the different drawbacks, it's just a tad hard to find what starts where. There are sufficient drawbacks, though.

Swordsman Glare: State what can break the paralysis (you should redefine as a paralysis rather than a stun).

Prisoner's Plea: The immobilization nullify is (a. a bit too high in rank for the damage you're doing, equal-rank should be fin. (B. it should only apply to physical restraints (or those like the Kanashibari no Jutsu). Nerve paralysis is a whole different thing.

Misdirection: This jutsu's function is....vague, at best.

Secret Blade: First, detail what kind of Bukijutsu sub-specialization this technique requires (such as Kenjutsu or Swordsmanship).
I'm not liking the completely invisible thing. These should leave some sort of distortion that a Perception stat of appropriate rank can pick up. (Up to 1 rank higher than the rank of the jutsu would do.) However, if you want to keep the invisibility, choose at least one of the following.
  • Expend more chakra.
  • Wield one sword only with this technique.

Also, the multi-rank wielding capability I just see as being completely avoided. However, you should detail what breaks the sword(s), as well as what it costs to make another one.

4The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Mon Dec 29, 2014 1:15 pm

Tame

Tame


D-rank
I presume we're just going through the sensory ability, as you didn't make many jutsu changes yet.

The Fuuton weakness as well as the Ninjutsu one (damage and Reaction Time) will suffice for balancing the sensory.

You can keep two of the other drawbacks to balance the +1 with close combat. (One preferably being the bad with money, which I think you should make into a Special Characteristic for this clan.)

5The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Tue Dec 30, 2014 2:22 am

Tame

Tame


D-rank
The KKG itself is almost perfect (though I advise a more professional Special Characteristic name).

Get to work on your jutsu~

6The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Mon Apr 06, 2015 8:01 pm

Shinya

Shinya


D-rank
umm guys is everything okay like this :o

7The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Wed Apr 15, 2015 6:31 pm

Ayakashi

Ayakashi


S-rank
Hai! okay lets get into this, not too much more to do i don't think on the clan itself :)

I'd like the clan to have a history, or move the history out of the KKG area.

KKG Description:

I'd like a check on their sensory ability, i don't like that it allows you to sense any movement at any rank, so, i would like you to determine that stealth techniques of equal rank or higher to the passive sensory are able to hide from it.

Also, can you undo the coding you have through the kkg description, it's distracting, and some of it outright hides things >.>

jutsu:

1/ one turn stuns begin at B rank, this also needs a speed attached to it. How fast is the jutsu? This also needs to be ninjutsu, i don't see how this links to your clan KKG...

2/ I'm going to need you to re-word this jutsu, as i simply do not understand what you are trying to do, what the condition you say is, how you are damaging a person 2" deep, and what kind of damage it is...

3/ reduce it to one rank higher, you're not getting 2.

4/ Your damages ETC are fine, i would like sensory of 'equal rank of the sword or higher' to be able to see them, i would also like a perception check to these as well, that a ninja with a perception of 'one rank higher' than the activated level of the jutsu is able to see the outline of the swords

danke. Post in the Reqs thread again when you're done~

8The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Fri Apr 24, 2015 3:31 am

Shinya

Shinya


D-rank
I did everything you told me, thank you a lot Mizukage -sama <3

9The Yatogami Clan~! Empty Re: The Yatogami Clan~! Sun Apr 26, 2015 12:21 am

Ayakashi

Ayakashi


S-rank
History:

You still have nothing under this section <3

KKG & Drawbacks:

I think you're over-thinking your wording a little when it comes to this area

Just saying: "Members of this clan get +1 reaction speed when using taijutsu or fighting people using taijutsu." Is more than clear enough, rather than trying to word it carefully.

You'll find that I, and 99% of other mods prefer clarity and simplicity. <3

But yeah, if you would like to go through and just make them clearer like that, it would be fantastic.

Ie. "Members of the clan receive -1 tier to reaction time when using or fighting against ninja who use bukijutsu. Due to them loathing the specialization."

Otherwise the pros and cons themselves are fine <3

Jutsu:

1/ I know it's a pain but could you please give a definitive speed, and also, this still has nothing to do with the clan KKG. For something to be a part of the KKG, is it has to use what you've described in the KKG as a tool in order to operate. So, EG, this COULD be a KKG ability if it were to say, fluctuate power through their sensory aura in a pulse to stun everything within it for a post. and you would would give the speed of the pulse.

So you need to integrate them somehow, at the moment it's just an attack. and should be ninjutsu.

2/ bukijutsu is defined as using chakra flow to imbue an item or something else with a property, imbuing yourself would be taijutsu or medical ninjutsu. Make that change please <3

3/ make it 'less than half' as it stands you need to be at exactly half :) and it's fine, use one technique at one rank higher than you would normally be able to for 20 chakra. I would rather you remove the +5 chakra thing, and just make this technique B rank though. I think it should also say the next 'bukijutsu' technique the ninja uses can be one rank higher than their limits, as, this is a buki skill...

4/ this jutsu is perfect.

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