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1Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Empty Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Wed Jan 21, 2015 4:59 am

AkaneJugo

AkaneJugo


D-rank
Holy Sovereignty of Teuton 2qitw76


Clan: Holy Sovereignty of Teuton

Kekkei Genkai:  
Archon Manifestation

Elements:
Those wishing to create a Teuton may chose two basic elements for their character.

Specialization:
A Teuton must take Bukijutsu as their primary and Ninjutsu as their secondary specialization.

Location:
The empire of Teuton have landed on the shores of Kirigakure and have several heavily fortified galleons there as their base of operations.

Clan History:
It is the prerogative of all human civilizations to believe themselves uniquely blessed. Somehow superior to all other strains of mankind though in reality this is rarely the case. The Shinju progenitor of the substance known in the east as Chakra was not a localized phenomenon. Atrocities are universally linked to the human race and where sufficient numbers gather even the seemingly unfathomable degree of carnage and suffering required for such a genesis will be repeated.  

So it was that across the vast oceans chaos reigned. In primeval times roving war bands led by charismatic raiders and demagogues held dominion over the land. Those not strong   enough were either subjugated or merely crushed underfoot in displays of savage barbarism. Inevitably the sanguine toll reaped by these senseless acts tipped the metaphysical scales and a Shinju was born. For the first time in recorded history a ceasefire was called as both aggressor and victim's hearts filled with awe and dread by the monolithic tree.

Before long the towering entity had spawned its first fruit made visible to all. None showed the courage required to taste the sacred morsel however and they were brought low by their own cowardice. Finally a hermit stepped forth – weary of the savagery that plagued his land he had confined himself to the hidden and desolate parts of the world. Viewing the advent of the Shinju as a portent he had returned to what passed for civilization. Striding to the gourd he proceeded to consume the unearthly harvest gaining in the process both vast stores of Gnosis and the raw power to shape the very land to his will.

This sage became known as the great prophet Vainamoinen interpreter of the tree of life and death who went on to instruct men in both the arcane arts of sorcery and the ways of martial chivalry. Those who studied under Vainamoinen were granted the title of saint and many founded kingdoms of their own.  

Tutonius first king of Tuton and knight of the Infinite Azure was one of these first monarchs and under his benevolent rule many heroic deeds were accomplished. Across the centuries there would be other wars but these were tempered with honor and mercy with knights holding to their vows of protecting the weak and innocent.

The present age does not necessarily reflect this reality however as for each noble and just knight there is another who uses his status to cruelly subjugate the peasantry.  Mages fare little different and the art of trafficking with demons is disturbingly common amongst the sorcererous elements of Tuton. The people grow dissatisfied with their lot and many challenge the ideals that hold to the core of morality claiming vast revisionism lies at the core of Teutons history and  casting the prophet  and his followers into a sinister light while demanding revolution for the lower classes.

Not knowing how to pacify the people of his kingdom without either surrendering his crown to insurgents or engaging in bloody civil war the king has endorsed in reckless expansion of his empire. Victory and subjugated lands make for fine spoils and the elation felt by such triumphs  for a time pacify the people however soon the joys of old victories ware off and demand for new glories grow.  

Teuton has come across an enemy of roughly its own caliber another great and ancient empire massive in size and equally as hungry for expansion. A stalemate is growing and with it the people are becoming irate something must be done in order to break the impasse and so a special diplomatic mission was sent to a nation of unmatched killers.  

The first black ship landed on the shores of Kirigakure demanding to meet with the rulers of the ninja world and strange armored men from an alien culture entered into the land of the shinobi.

Kekkei Genkai Description:
Members of the Teuton clan are great warriors from across the sea, they are renowned for their swordsmanship, but even more-so, are known for their peculiar Kekkei Genkai which creates a psychic manifestation of their inner psyche from their own chakra. Called Archons, this manifestation always emanates from the user's back and hovers behind and slightly above the Teuton clan member, replicating every action the swordsman makes, unless ordered otherwise...

Archons come in many shapes and sizes, though usually, are larger than the caster, Archons can have anatomical weaponry (of 6” or smaller) which are equivalent to the rank the Archon is manifested at, and no higher, as are any inherent anatomical weapons (Claws, horns, being on fire.) Each Member of the Teuton clan's Archon, is a set imprint of their psychi that, in its base-most state, does not change. (Though it could be transformed or weaponized further with jutsu/ Techniques.) Upon creating a Teuton character's free jutsu, they are able to app the visage of their Archon using the following Template, which must be displayed at the top of their jutsu list. Archons are able to start with +1 to a single tier and gain another +1 at B rank, but otherwise Archons operate at base stats for rank it is summoned at. Archons may also start with one anatomical weapon such as horns or claws and gain another at B rank. The stats for these features are described in the jutsu.

Code:
[b]Name:[/b] (The Name of the Characters Archon)

[b]Physical Appearance:[/b] (How it Appears/ Looks)

[b]Elemental Alignment:[/b] (What element the Archon is, if any. Nature must be possessed by the Teuton clan member.)

[b]Distinct Characteristics:[/b] (Any Claws, horns/ weapons of 6” or smaller, being on fire, clan tier increases etc. Any passive elemental effects it might possess, which must parallel in nature with an element owned by the Teuton clan member.)

Additionally, the unique heavy-armour worn by the Teuton clan is vastly superior (though more costly) than the current armour of the Ninja world.  Teutonian Heavy Armour reduces the speed of the user by one tier less than Ninja heavy armor.


Drawbacks:

~ Fuuinjutsu interacting with Archons and their techniques, interact as if they were 1 rank higher.

~ Teuton Clan members learn their secondary element at C rank and cannot train a Tertiary or Quaternary element, (Thus are unable to take Hesitant (Element) as a Negative Special Characteristic)

~ If the Teuton member's Archon is destroyed, it causes extreme pain, reducing their reaction time by -1 tier for 2 turns.

~ The Teuton's unique armour costs 15% more ryo than normal, and must be specified that it is 'Teutonian Heavy Armour' as its armour class.


Members:

TBA


Kekkei Genkai Jutsu:

Name: Teuton Archon Manifestation Technique

Canon/Custom: Custom

Rank: Rank Dependant

Type: Offensive / Defensive

Element: Ninja Dependant

Range: 5-25m

Speciality: Sorcery (Ninjutsu)

Duration: Maintainable

Cool-down: Duration x2

Description: This technique can only be activated at the caster's ninja rank, and cannot be activated at lower or higher ranks.

Members of the Teuton Clan are able to manifest their own personal Archon (As per their archon app in their jutsu list); a chakra manifestation of their own psyche. Archons can have various appendages which can be used as weapons and provide themselves as the catalysts for other Teuton Archon Ninjutsu techniques (One such feature at below B rank and a second once they reach B). Archons can be used as a focal point to cast jutsu from however it is the caster not the Archon itself that casts the jutsu. While Archon may appear to be living beings they are merely a chakra manifestation. Due to the remote nature of casting from an Archon jutsu of lower than B rank cost an extra +5 Chakra to preform while Jutsu of B rank and above cost an extra +10 Chakra. Techniques that involve both the Archon and the Teuton always have the increased Chakra cost. Archons can be destroyed by being hit with a jutsu equal to the rank they are manifested at or two techniques of one rank lower, and can perform basic attacks and move and react within their range with base statistics equal to the rank of the jutsu when cast. (+ any additional augmentations.)

The range of control and the overall strength of the Archon ranges depending on the rank the manifestation is preformed, Archons are tethered to their host, and cannot leave these areas unless empowered by a technique. Passive elemental effects possessed by the Archon (being on fire, or electric aligned).


  • D Rank: 5 meter radius, Anatomical weapons can cut a 1 inch deep, Elemental effects deal minor 1st degree tissue damage
  • C Rank: 10 meter radius, Anatomical weapons can cut a 1.5 inches deep Elemental effects deal minor 2nd degree tissue damage
  • B Rank: 15 meter radius, Anatomical weapons can cut a 2 inches deep Elemental effects deal minor 3rd degree tissue damage
  • A Rank: 20 meter radius, Anatomical weapons can cut 3 inches deep, Elemental effects deal major 3rd degree tissue damage.
  • S Rank: 25 meter radius, Anatomical weapons can cut through a ninja, Elemental effects get no stronger at this rank.



Name:Durers arcane blades.

Canon/Custom:Custom

Rank:A

Type:Offensive

Element:NA

Range:3-10 meters

Specialty:Sorcery(Ninjutsu) and Weapons Mastery(Bukijutsu)

Duration:2 Posts

Cooldown:6 Posts

Description: The user conjures a blade of energy either around their weapon or from their hand of three to ten meters in length. If the caster has their Archon active then the projected guardian gains a copy of the blade. The blades are made of pure chakra and can cut through flesh and bone with relative ease able to sever a limb but not bisect a person (can cut through around 2 feet of flesh). This effect lasts for two turns and can be used multiple times within that period. The blades manifest at 35 meters per second from an initial point.



Name: Athanasius's immaculate shielding.

Canon/Custom:Custom.

Rank:B

Type:Defensive

Element:NA

Range:Personal.

Specialty:Defensive.

Duration:3 Posts.

Cooldown:6 Posts

Description: Using sorcery (ninjutsu) the caster calls forth a defensive aura around either themselves or their Archon. This wall    while not particularly unique is still useful in that it can block two offensive techniques of its rank or lower or one technique of one rank higher. The technique wears off after three posts and must be recast again to once more reap its benefits.


Name:Paracles's versatile Orbs.

Canon/Custom:Custom

Rank:A

Type:Ninjutsu

Element:NA

Range: 60 meters with multiple 1 foot damage radius or a single 7 meter radius.

Specialty:Sorcery (Ninjutsu)

Duration:1 Post

Cooldown:4 Posts

Description: Utilizing this technique the caster forms a large violet orb of pure energy within their hand. This can either be thrown and split into 30 lesser orbs which upon impact can split flesh and fracture bone or create a surging explosion in the area around the user   which while not harming the caster throws back enemies with enough force to break bone. Each smaller orb moves at 40 meters per second whist a single orb explosion moves at 30 meters per second.



Last edited by AkaneJugo on Thu Jan 29, 2015 5:57 am; edited 12 times in total

2Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Empty Re: Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Fri Jan 23, 2015 1:59 pm

Tenmei

Tenmei


D-rank
Alright, let's begin. Starting with.

KKG Dsscription:
-
First things first, I find it a little odd that a clan who is 'known for swordsmanship' doesn't have bukijutsu as a spec

-Avoid using the word 'summoning'. What you are attempting is close to becoming a part of the kuchiyose spec. So use the word 'manifesting' in order to prevent wires from getting crossed.

-I like the idea but I want some restrictions on the Archons because they give you a lot.
Concerning anatomical weapons, I want you to specify that they can have no more than 1 feature (whether it be claws they use or horns) and possibly evolve to 2 at B rank.
As or jutsu, I would like it to be specified that they can use jutsu at one rank lower than the shinobi. 

-As for your divided +2 tiers. I would be happier if you have it as +1 to begin with and they get another at B Rank.

-Finally, I want you to explain this to me.

"Additionally, the unique heavy-armour worn by the Teuton clan which is vastly superior (though more costly) than the current armour of the Ninja world.  Teutonian Heavy Armour does not reduce the speed of the user, (though in the case of taijutsu users, the penalty is reduced to -1 instead of -2)."


Where did that -2 come from? You say it doesn't reduce speed but then it does? Please clarify.

-------

Drawbacks:

-
You seem to have this mostly well balanced, for now.

Jutsu:
- I dumped a whole lot on you so once you fix up those edits, then we will move on to this.

-----

Bump when you are done.

3Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Empty Re: Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Fri Jan 23, 2015 4:50 pm

AkaneJugo

AkaneJugo


D-rank
Tenmei wrote:Alright, let's begin. Starting with.

KKG Dsscription:
-
First things first, I find it a little odd that a clan who is 'known for swordsmanship' doesn't have bukijutsu as a spec

-Avoid using the word 'summoning'. What you are attempting is close to becoming a part of the kuchiyose spec. So use the word 'manifesting' in order to prevent wires from getting crossed.

-I like the idea but I want some restrictions on the Archons because they give you a lot.
Concerning anatomical weapons, I want you to specify that they can have no more than 1 feature (whether it be claws they use or horns) and possibly evolve to 2 at B rank.
As or jutsu, I would like it to be specified that they can use jutsu at one rank lower than the shinobi. 

-As for your divided +2 tiers. I would be happier if you have it as +1 to begin with and they get another at B Rank.

-Finally, I want you to explain this to me.

"Additionally, the unique heavy-armour worn by the Teuton clan which is vastly superior (though more costly) than the current armour of the Ninja world.  Teutonian Heavy Armour does not reduce the speed of the user, (though in the case of taijutsu users, the penalty is reduced to -1 instead of -2)."


Where did that -2 come from? You say it doesn't reduce speed but then it does? Please clarify.

-------

Drawbacks:

-
You seem to have this mostly well balanced, for now.

Jutsu:
- I dumped a whole lot on you so once you fix up those edits, then we will move on to this.

-----

Bump when you are done.

Cool thanks for the quick reply.

Changed Bukijutsu to an necessary primary spec as well as clarifying how the armor stats work.

Replaced all mentions of the word summoning with manifestation (Which I must admit is more accurate and sounds cooler anyways XD)

Divided natural weapons and tier buffs into the level specific restrictions suggested.

Regarding the Archon jutsu thing - I think I may have explained this poorly sorry . The Archon cannot actually cast Jutsu itself as unlike a pet or summon its not actually alive or even a separate entity than the caster. All jutsu cast with the Archon as a focus come from the characters own chakra pool.

Casting a jutsu from an Archon is essentially a character casting a nijutsu from whatever point the Archon is at the time. In order to reflect this better as well as show the difficulties of casting at a distance I added a +5 chakra cost to jutsu C rank and under jutsu channeled through the Archon rank and a +10 cost to all Jutsu of B rank or higher cast through the Archon.

4Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Empty Re: Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Thu Jan 29, 2015 5:49 am

Tenmei

Tenmei


D-rank
Alright, those changes look good.
Next we will have a look at your jutsu
---

-Teuton Archon Manifestation Technique: This one is nicely written out. Under the 'Rank' heading I would like you to put 'D-S' just to be clear. I would also like you to be more detailed in your degrees of tissue damage. For example: D rank will be minor first degree and C rank will be major first, minor second and so on.

-Durers arcane blades: You don't need the 'or' in the specializations. If you are making an energy sword then you need to have both. Also specify how much tissue and bone damage you are doing just to be clear.

-Athanasius's immaculate shielding: Is by the books so is fine.

-Paracles's versatile Orbs. - Reduce the single orb explosion speed to 30m/s

------------
Bump when these changes are done

5Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Empty Re: Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Thu Jan 29, 2015 5:59 am

AkaneJugo

AkaneJugo


D-rank
Have fixed all these.

Hope this looks good :)

6Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Empty Re: Holy Sovereignty of Teuton Thu Jan 29, 2015 6:05 am

Tenmei

Tenmei


D-rank
Alright. This appears to be balanced fairly.
I don't see anything else wrong here.

Holy Sovereignty of Teuton TenmeiApproves

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