Please delete

I'm still looking over this, but lemme give you some preliminary edits. Clans cannot have more than 3 kekkei genkai jutsu, and none of them can be SS rank. So, remove some of the jutsu and lower the scaling to S-Rank, maximum. Moving on, durations of jutsu are measured in posts, since time is fluid in roleplay here. Things like "sustained" and "twenty minutes" won't work/apply. Read thr jutsu rules for more info on that...Next, Senjutsu is limited to being only a third or fourth spec; so would members of this clan get senjutsu free when they start, or still have to learn it themselves? Also, it's not common to see a clan that gives you three free scaling jutsu AND a +1 to a spec (and certainly not all of that and free Senjutsu, far too powerful), so either add more drawbacks to balance this, or make some of the jutsu non-scaling and give them a solid rank, or make them require a high word count to train between ranks of the jutsu. Make those edits and we'll continue.

edited

First, put each clan jutsu in its own spoiler. Reduces clutter.

Then, anything that you might consider 'flavor text' (which are things that don't really give any statistical information) can be omitted from the Kekkei Genkai Description. As far as I can see, it's a +1 to Ninjutsu (is this the power of Ninjutsu or +1 to the usage of ninjutsu?)

Drawbacks....Okay, they can't manipulate lightning, wind, or genjutsu. Fair. You say they're weak to Genjutsu; does this constitute a +1 in rank to effectiveness of Genjutsu affecting the clan member?

Second one. Detail how many jutsu they can use before incurring damage. How are the prodigies identified?


~Work in progress. Will be back soon. <3

Edited

Okay, drawbacks are:

Mandatory and un-balanceable Frail, cannot take Mighty.

Takes 10 chakra for any telekinetic jutsu? Are you saying this is a flat rate or it takes 10 more chakra to use telekinetic jutsu than normal? Also, is this only for activation costs, or maintenance costs too?

Can't defend against attacks that don't have physical matter to them, -1 to genjutsu.

Overall, balanced clan-wise. Now it's time for your jutsu. First off, don't make your jutsu with the +1 in mind. Always assume that it can be nullified (because there are jutsu that do that). If you want, make the base jutsu and put in a spoiler below it what the +1 does.

Redirect: This makes it....impossible for people to hit you with physical attacks. Not only that, but it also redirects any projectile thrown at you? I frankly don't like the rebound portion of this....seems too powerful for something that costs only 10 more chakra. Find a way to balance this, it's too powerful.

Obliterate: Not actually bad, but how does the debris shield you exceptionally from jutsu? That's my trouble. Also, the wide range of this type of jutsu means you can very likely pick up people, which is....not exactly my cup of tea. If anything, say how they can escape.

Devastation Wave: Shinra Tensei. No.

Chaotic Whirlwind: A lot of these drawbacks are hypotheticals. Do they die or do they not? There is no maybe.

Tame from last post wrote:Takes 10 chakra for any telekinetic jutsu? Are you saying this is a flat rate or it takes 10 more chakra to use telekinetic jutsu than normal? Also, is this only for activation costs, or maintenance costs too?

Redirect: 4 jutsu of one rank lower, two of equal rank, one of one rank higher.

Obliterate: didn't do what I asked.

Chaotic Whirlwind: This has....zero drawbacks. At least say how it can be escaped. Also, something like this probably isn't going to have a normal -10 per post maintenance cost.

Bump

bumping this because im interested in this clan

Your KKG description....I'm not okay with the 'control anything at a subatomic level' clause. That turns into weird atomic manipulation/alchemy things that haven't been approved yet and probably should be their own thing.

Define what 'easier to use' entails, and why this is.

The other impressive feats you have listed, do not need to be there. That's just flavor text.

Uh, why do you say 'each jutsu grows stronger'? Is that referencing the multi-rank capabilities of each listed clan jutsu? Or is it actually saying that all of their jutsu no matter what rank up in power with them? You need to be specific, and omit anything that is flavor text.

"Members are typically very weak in the area of Gen and not very suited for Taijutsu given they sacrifice it for Nin and Sen. But it is not unheard of for a hybrid of both styles to be born, capable of mixing the Kekkei Genkai with frontal attacks. A punch to the gut could perhaps crush the insides of an opponent if used correctly."

All of this is just flavor text, it doesn't need to be in there. If you want them to be weak in Genjutsu, require it only be taken as a fourth specialty or something.

Drawbacks. The "perk for strength" is Mighty. Your third drawback is split into two lines for some reason. The counts for what causes what recoil, it should be in posts of how long has the jutsu been 'turned on', not how many times you activate the jutsu. It probably should also vary with the user's rank.

Erm, can you redo your jutsu without the +1, if they include them? And then, in a spoiler below the jutsu, say what the clan's +1 does. In addition, use the Guidelines' meters-per-second speeds instead of MPH. I don't want you to shortchange yourself.

Redirection: You need a clear definition of what each rank of the jutsu can redirect, and also at what defined speed (check the Jutsu Guidelines for details on that). It should be for each specific rank, not D-B and A-S. The cooldown should also vary (say, Duration +2).

Obliterate: Does the reduction in power of jutsu that are aimed at the user stay constant, or does it only work once? Also, you say 'expend additional chakra' to 'detonate', yet you don't mention how much it takes to do so. Also, at each rank, you should state the range. "Lastly you need radius. Start small and work up. S rank should be 50 meters. Keep it the same as the mph for simplicity" may confuse people.

Chaos Whirlwind: How fast does the user move when in this state? Otherwise, what's the damage on this?