Rising from an artificial forest floor, contestants enter atop a wild canopy of dense forest, with doors leading them onto its apex. The terrain itself is wildly unpredictable at the top, practically necessitating the use of Supernatural Walking Practice to navigate without hindrance. However, dropping below the canopy reveals an arena of tall trees with sparse horizontal foliage for climbing.

Having been engulfed in flames and had the left side of his body burned to melting point the shinobi known as Xiao was unable to physically attend the next round lest he arrive in a full body cast. Before the exams Xiao had a feeling, an unearthly feeling perhaps that one may call a sixth sense but as a spider perhaps it was only unique to he. A "spider's sense" if you will. That made Xiao consider the obvious, he wasn't here to win as he had stated many times but rather wished to meet atleast one person from each village, cheer his friends on and see Kirigakure reclaim it's status as top dog. That was all he really wanted, to him the Chuunin exams may have been important to some and they certainly were important but he did feel he just wasn't ready to be a Chuunin. He was a keen strategist, that was certain but when it came to jutsu he had about 3 and could barely take a punch not to mention being perpetually stuck at under five foot he wasn't exactly the scariest presence in the world and thus Xiao set up a failsafe in the name of a man who had no equal in the shinobi world...because he wasn't a part of the shinobi world. His name was Jeff Sanders, a recent divorcee and father of two who donned a collared t-shirt with two of the three buttons undone who had opted to visit the shinobi world for the chuunin exams because in his own words he had 'seen a couple of those Gokken movies' and he figured he 'got' the whole shinobi thing.

Gary and Xiao had met in passing when they had both ordered the takoyaki with vinegar sauce on a skewer and Gary had trouble devouring the stick allowing Xiao to make him a small webbed bowl. Gary knew that his life debt was sealed that day. Once more they met when hiking and Xiao valiantly opted to help him take his picture in several poses, at least seven, in front of monuments - the acts of a saint. Gary and Xiao's third and final meeting was before the Chuunin Exams, already Xiao was 'cashing in' telling Gary to open one letter if he won the battle and one if he lost. Though their friendship was short lived, the romance just like any highschool fling with that one girl you never thought you'd get would always be kept in both of their hearts. The middle aged man who had witnessed Xiao's defeat with only one tear rolling down his enlarged cheeks simply nodded to himself as he watched Xiao's match from the side lines and opened the letter...a letter that would change the world. Well, no, not really. It was just a letter that had instructions as to what to do.

Gary made his way to the round 2 chambers, carrying with him "Xiaocrow" in a ruck sack "webbed" to his back that was really a combination of tissue paper and PVA Glue, it was a wonder of paper mache and it's endless uses that Gary had honed in his S Rank of Craftsmenship. Though unable to hit like a Taijutsu expert, Gary could build a home made glitter tube from scratch with his eyes closed. Unable to perform chakra? Well who needs it when you know how to brew your own ale from nothing but a store bought pack. Gary was truly an S-Class shinobi and with the satchel on his back he donned the apparel that was needed to pull off Xiao's final wish. Forming a makeshirt costume out of nothing but a rare bison steak, a mug of kumogakure ale, a form fitting belt and a licensed Xiao Guan costume patent pending he was ready to go.

Making his way to the judges table dressed as Xiao Guan the execution was flawless as many shinobi who awaited their own testing found him to be a near exact match. As he approached the table of the escorts he rubbed his hands together and tried to impersonate Xiao to the best of his ability and despite his thick jersey accent "'Ey, yeah, you there. I'm uh, the guy. You know, web guy. What's his face. Show Gwen. That's me." he stated pointing to his chest as he looked to the two chuunin examiners who looked to one another "Sir are....you certain you are the contestant Xiao Guan of Kirigakure?" they asked in confusion as Gary began to scratch his nether region "Yeah, Bingo. That's it. Ya got me." he proceeded to draw out two streamers that he had wrapped around his wrist and rolled tightly into balls "Look I uh, I got the thing. The webs. Look at that" he remarked as he threw the bandage forward having it land on the desk of the chuunin who simply rolled his eyes "Look at it go. Majestic isn't it. Look uhhh, look this doesn't matter. None of this matters. Let's go" he stated as he gestured to the doors, the chuunin examiner almost speaking out before the other silenced him with his hand "Just...let him go..." he stated as Gary shot finger guns at the two examiners "My man. That's what I'm talkin' bout...now uhh, go check on me in 10, y'know, cause this guys going down and then Im taking a nap. Friggen ninja costume rides up." Gary stated waddling to the entrance and adjusting his ill fitting costume grasping his webbed package. The Xiaocrow.

As Gary entered the arena he followed the specifications Xiao had written down, walking into the arena and placing the Xiaocrow in a brush so that it's head was visible from the brush but not much else "Yeah that'd do it....Nah wait." Gary stated drawing a marker and quickly sketching a note that read "Suck it nerds" onto the Xiaocrow and pinning it to his left 'breast' before clapping his hands to dust them off "Alright. Now I'm done. Life debt repaid...I'm gonna go get some wings. Shinobi girls are wicked hot, lets see if I can get one of them too" he remarked chuckling to himself as he waddled out of the arena passing the two chuunin examiners as he shot the finger guns once more at the two "Yeah, I ain't him" he stated non-challantly as he began to hum gently to himself as he made his way out of the entrance examination quarters where he spied a five dollar coupon to Shinobite a local burger chain, holding it on high and leaping in the air with glee "Frick yeah!"


Meanwhile Xiaocrow stood valiantly watching over the land, standing valiantly watching over the land. The mighty creature that knew no equal, poised and stoic in all situations and ready to take on the world. As for Xiao himself? Well...You'd have to ask Kaito about that.


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Stats for XiaoCrow:
Strength: -E5 (Cannot Attack)
Endurance: -E5 (A stiff breeze destroys it)
Reaction Time: -E5 (Has no senses)
Perception: -E5 (Has even less than those senses above)
Speed: -E10 (Immobile)

Stats for Gary:
Strength: Can crush a Zero Sugar Mother Energy Drink with one hand
Endurance: Able to Marathon series on netflix with no bathroom breaks
Reaction Time:Able to air guitar to Paradise City by Slash (because Axel's version may be OG but it aint Slash) like a professional
Perception: Knows atleast 3 species of bird
Speed: Somehow is automatically within your personal space at all times.

Yasuke would be in the waiting area once more, as the proctor came up to him and showed him to the doors he had realized it was the same arena he had fought in the first round. Yasuke had taken an "L" for the first match from a point difference and the fact that he had less chakra than his opponent. Yasuke however, wouldn't let this get him down he knew he still had a chance to win it all if he played his cards right. Yasuke calmly walked through the doors of the arena and began leaping down branch by branch until he reach the bottom of the makeshift forest. Yasuke than began slowly trotting keeping an eye out for his surroundings as he wasn't sure if his opponent had arrived or not.

Slowly making his way through the forest Yasuke spotted a figure sticking out of a bush, Yasuke would stop a good 10 meters away as he analyzed the thing. The creature strongly resembled a crow but Yasuke couldn't be sure he knew the ninja of this day and age had all sorts of techniques. Yasuke would keep his distance keeping an eye on the crow looking figure as he would wait patiently to see if his opponent would arrive or perhaps maybe the crow thing might do something strange.

226.

The simple fact as they if they would be the appropriate word to use in such a situation as usually such a phrase denotes the fact that both parties were in fact sentient or atleast alive, though in this circumstance it was quite a different event whether viewed philosophically, metaphysically or even through the eyes of the absurdist this situation was frankly just strange and though goths would perpetually proclaim that normal was a mere setting on a washing machine and other such cringe inducing phrases to justify their antisocial attitudes the fact was that normally speaking, used in the traditional sense of normality that was, a man does not oft do battle with a tool nor a tool that is made specifically to render those carrion criminals that continued their constant cavalcade of consistent collection of corn. This was naught in the slightest what many would deem a wild battle nor that of a 'fight' that could be deemed anything more than one of pure absurdity and yet it continued which brought with it the question as to what an object would do when attacked or provoked. The obvious answer was that such an object would certainly, or rather, simply adhere to the rules of physics and bend and twist to the will of force speed and momentum and standing at 10 It was a scarecrow. A scarecrow decorated to look as if it was Xiao but in that concept came quite a lot of work. Was it a mere tool or perhaps it was a perfect replica of who Xiao was ~ a creature content with its lot, masking its true nature in flamboyant costume

The notion of life itself was an odd one. Are we not just matter that has miraculously developped conciousness and drinking issues? Perhaps the only thing seperating the Xiaocrow from the remainder of humanity was his consistency in everything though one may argue the ship of argo philosophy when dealing with development of personality one must so too admit that a question that must be posed is when the creation of the object itself became the "prime" example of the original, if what change us internally was the mind and memory with no such thing in the sack of seed woven to a spiders mask what hope did the makeshift genin of the village hidden in the maise have of being considered departed from its prime source? When considering abstractly if the elements in their prior state are determined to be a transitional stage one face the slippery slope of an endlessly moving marker of the start of Xiaocrows existence.

Instead of worry about such things, as he had no ability to do so, nor spouting quips such as "Do I look like I was born yesterday? Because...Oh uhh wait, I was.", the scarecrow became possibly the least anxious contestant in the exams and though he wavered and weaved in the wind it was not through will or desire to defeat Yasuke but simply his existance or rather lack there of.

~~~~~
50/250
Jutsu used: SS Rank ~ 'DEATH KILL MO JUTSU

Spoiler:

Yasuke continued to wait patiently, until he heard the scarecrow looking object speak and in that same instance Yasuke took off while gathering Raiton chakra into his left hand. Closing the ten meter gap between himself and the being in mere seconds Yasuke would raise his left hand inches from the chest of the scarecrow releasing an arc of lightning chakra which would pulverize the target assuming it was a normal scarecrow.
Yasuke would then sigh thinking to himself, "Now what was I thinking about again before I was rudely interrupted"

Yasuke thought as he would hop into the nearest tree placing himself in a snug position between to branches as he would relax waiting for the proctor or another opponent to show up.

240/250:

As the lightning soared across the scarecrow electrifying it, the sack and broom combination soon fell to mere splinters. The Xiaocrows short life was finally over and just like the little shinobi it paid homage to it had ended here in the land of the chuunin exams. Perhaps Yasuke would do well in the next bracket, though perhaps Xiaocrow would return for revenge one day. Its splintered makeshift hand lurching out for that which had slain it for revenge against it menavingly forming a clutched fist akin to jason returns the greatest of all friday the 13th films and with it the Xiaocrow would hunt Yasuke for ever more like Michael Myers but with far much more corn.


(YASUKE WINS)