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1The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Tue Jun 20, 2017 9:55 pm

Yumo

Yumo


D-rank
Symbol:The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Gjvkolh_d


The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} FAHfQ33
Clan Name: Kitsuchi
Location: Scattered; Informally Kirigakure and Konohagakure
Specialization: Senjutsu, Tertiary only
Elements: Katon


The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} HhU72Pp
Clan History:

The Spoken Tale of the Kitsuchi:

Modern Kitsuchi Clan:
Members:
Kitsune Characteristics:

Known Clanmembers:
NPCs
Atyama - Foxborn Kitsune, Father of the Kitsuchi
Suchi - First Truly Asended Kitune, Mother of the Kitsuchi

Player Characters:
Kitsuchi, Yumo - Kirigakure Genin; Orphan

The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Y4syLuV

Kekkei Genkai Name: FoxFire
Kekkei Genkai Description:

FoxFire is the evolved genetic result of the humanoid Kitsuchi chakra network being essentially incomplete by human standards. Most Senjutsu chakra is created by taking a ratio of human chakra and transmutating it with equal measure of nature chakra to make it mouldable by human standards. Kitsuchi however are born with smaller chakra reserves and less tenketsu points because of their chakras Kitsune heritage.

The Kitsuchi chakra network is not created from their human ancestor, Suchi. Instead the Kitsuchi clan was gifted by a True Kitsune with his own ever living chakra. This is the cause of the various differences between non Kitsuchi.

In response to the smaller chakra reserves Kitsuchi passively absorb and store Nature chakra. In general the ratio is 80/20, nature/personal, in regards to using chakra for FoxFire.

All Kitsuchi are born with FoxFire and an adept ability to transmutate and craft their chakra for senjutsu. However because of their mutation created by their natural affinity for Senjutsu the Kitsuchis chakra network can only be used for FoxFire based senjutsu. Due to the natural manifestion of the Kitsuchis nature energy and chakra mixture being flame all Kitsuchi must take Katon as their primary element.

All Kitsuchi must start with Senjutsu as their tertiary specilization to their chakra network only being effective through an amalgamation of nature energy and their own chakra.

A gift from nature to the foxes, and from the Kitsune to man. FoxFire is almost pure nature chakra in phtsical form, only capable by their own dedicated efforts to control their meak personal chakra resource. Drawing off of the Kitsuchi's fiery passion to grow as a master of Kitsune Sage Arts FoxFire manifests through the element of fire as nearly pure energy.

The mystical FoxFire appears to be oddly coloured coloured flames. However, upon closer inspection the FoxFlame naturally emits a temperature slightly under the current temperature unless the technique wills otherwise. FoxFire generally acts as massless fire with the  mobile capabilities  to spread, grow, exist and fade. FoxFire is also capable of exprssing energy in other ways like bright lights and whistling sounds if a technique wills it.

Depending on the users secondary or tertiary elements FoxFire techniques can have a variety of physical effects similar to as followed:

(Guidelines for physical properties of the FoxFire; Use as Triggers for Genjutsu etc.)
Suiton based FoxFlames could "absorb" into fabric like a stain but cannot have a mass
Raiton based flames could store static electricity but will always be massless
Doton Based flames could be composed of mud and have mass
Fuuton Based Flames could move very quickly and almost invisibly about the terrain but cannot have mass

Tailed Ascension Through FoxFire:

Bound Kitsunes Ascension:
Drawbacks:

The Cost of FoxFire:
Untailed Kitsuchi Drawbacks:
Tailed Kitsuchi Drawbacks:



Last edited by Yumo on Fri Jun 30, 2017 11:49 pm; edited 9 times in total

2The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Sun Jun 25, 2017 11:32 pm

Yumo

Yumo


D-rank
Bump for final polish

3The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Fri Jun 30, 2017 4:49 am

Issei

Issei


D-rank
First things first, you can remove the quote coding around your post~

Taking Stamina isn’t a drawback, since that is a positive SC. I don’t know what Secondarily Weak (Element) is, I assume it’s a custom SC that's already been approved but I want the description of it put into a spoiler or a code box. The concept of foxflames don’t make sense to me really, because apparently they can be any element but fire as long as they’re below B-Rank? Which makes them...not fire. Idk it doesn’t really make sense. And how are they different than regular Katon jutsu when they are above B-Rank and fire-based? I don’t see how it relates to the whole Senjutsu nature chakra-absorbing tail thing. So in general all of that needs to be ironed out and explained more clearly. Other than that I think the drawbacks and word count and ryo costs balance out the positives, so bump when you've finished your edits.

http://www.narutosaga.com/t23427-new-organization-ninshiki#18669

4The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Fri Jun 30, 2017 6:43 pm

Yumo

Yumo


D-rank
Bump.

I ironed out what i could if it makes more sense and its time for approval im gonna woot it up. Ps The idea behind infusing FoxFire in a secondary elementis that the player uses their element as a catalyst to trigger cool senjutsu. Or set up combos.

5The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Fri Jun 30, 2017 8:02 pm

Issei

Issei


D-rank
Once again, taking stamina isn't a drawback, because that is a positive SC. If you want them to take stamina, move that to the kekkei genkai description of the untailed path. You can also move the requirement to take Katon and Senjutsu to the kekkei genkai description, as I don't consider those drawbacks either. In terms of the tailed kitsuchi kekkei genkai, I want you to specify that, rather than the chakra cost cannot go below 10 chakra, you instead specify that this cannot be stacked with other chakra cost reduction effects. Some other things:

Yumo wrote:+25 chakra, a -5 activation cost for all jutsu B rank or higher
while  inand sage  mode
Fix the typo here. So, you mean that you gain 25 chakra upon entering sage mode after ascension? or your total chakra pool increases? i.e. let's say you have 150/200 chakra. Use sage mode, 20 chakra to activate sage mode = 130/200 chakra, +25 chakra from ascension = 155/200 chakra (essentially gaining 5 chakra from activating Sage Mode rather than paying for it) OR 150/200 chakra, uses sage mode, 20 chakra to activate = 130/200, + 25 to chakra pool from ascension = 130/225?

Yumo wrote:9 Tails: The final tail the user can grow, and grants them the ability to use Rirīsu: Kitsune Anima  (Release:Kitsune Soul) through hidden teachings that are said to be Atyamas life force itself.
You mention this, but nothing else about Kitsune Soul is described. What does this ability do?

Finally, after your last drawback spoiler, you still have the [/quote] broken coding. Remove this.

http://www.narutosaga.com/t23427-new-organization-ninshiki#18669

6The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Fri Jun 30, 2017 10:20 pm

Yumo

Yumo


D-rank
Okay i fixed it right this time. Sorry i smoke a lot and sometimes get off track..

Kitsune Anima is gonna be the secret plotline twist shh dont spoil it lol ps thank you Issei i know this is probably difficult with all my typos.. Im gonna get a pc this week so i can type on a keyboard like a normal human being.

7The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Fri Jun 30, 2017 10:58 pm

Issei

Issei


D-rank
Yumo wrote:8 Tails:- Upon developing their eighth tail the Kitsuchis body overflows with FoxFlames while in Sage Mode. As a result the user charges B rank techbqiues and lower at -1 post amount. When in Sage Mode the user is granted +10 available chakra available concurrently with Sage Mode activation; But Sage mode cannot be activated if under 30 chakra. (i.e. let's say you have 150/200 chakra. Use sage mode, 20 chakra to activate sage mo
You seem to have copy-pasted the example I suggested, but only a portion of it. Furthermore, this doesn't read well; techniques is misspelled, the word available is used before and after the word chakra, and -1 post amount is a confusing phrase, so for clarification, fix the grammar and do you mean that techniques that require hand seals/preparation take 1 post less before they are ready?

And secret plotline twists are fine and everything...but if you mention it in your clan's kekkei genkai description, then I expect it to be fleshed out thoroughly so that it does not have any potential to be abused later on. So, either you can keep it to yourself as a jutsu that you'll app when you reach 9 tails and remove it from the clan altogether, or you can spoil the secret and describe what Kitsune Soul is. Your choice.

http://www.narutosaga.com/t23427-new-organization-ninshiki#18669

8The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Fri Jun 30, 2017 11:44 pm

Yumo

Yumo


D-rank
Okay i fleshed it out without being to bossy and leaky. Basically its gonna be for large scale stuff. Almost forgot the most important part lol**

9The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Sat Jul 01, 2017 12:40 am

Issei

Issei


D-rank
Alright, you've made all of the edits that I asked for and I'll let the typos and stuff slide for now since you don't have access to a computer. 1/2 approved.

Contact Mitsuo or Jet via PM for your final review, they're above me staff-wise so anything they say goes, even if it is different than what I told you. Good luck :)

http://www.narutosaga.com/t23427-new-organization-ninshiki#18669

10The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Sat Jul 01, 2017 6:08 am

Suchi

Suchi


D-rank
<3 ahh thabk you Issei. Youve helped me make the clan better :3

11The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Empty Re: The Kitsuchi Clan {Revamp} Wed Jul 05, 2017 9:16 pm

Issei

Issei


D-rank
I got a promotion, so you're set. Approved.

http://www.narutosaga.com/t23427-new-organization-ninshiki#18669

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