1 I May Be Strong... But Not At All [ Hyouga | Invite Only ] Sun May 15, 2016 9:39 am
Aizou
D-rank
The door had closed. He had left. Forgetting her hair, grabbed the towel and dried herself off, wrapping it around herself before stepping out of the showers and seeing, true to her suspicions and to the shattering of her heart, no one there.
‘Stop,’ she told herself. ‘It’s… it’s okay. I’m sure… I’m…’
But no words came to mind. No self-comforting words came to mind. Her head dipped down and her tail drooped as she swallowed, her mouth dry and slightly agape as she came to terms with this. What was she expecting? One night of fucking and she was going to go ask him out? He was probably leaving to go have a drink with his friends and tell them how he’d bagged a girl, made her make a fool of herself, then left.
… She needed something… she needed someone to talk to. She needed support and she didn’t- Wait, was that something on the bed? She sat down beside the towel she had prepared for him and saw a small note, handwritten by Maigo himself if the signature at the end was anything. As she read it, her hands tightened around the piece of paper, but her stormy emotions didn’t calm down.
‘Leaving unannounced?’ she thought. ‘Dinner? Who does he think he is?!’
She didn’t know what to think. He had left. He had something more important to do and he- Why was she so worried about this!? She was Aizou Kitsuchi, she shouldn’t be- But she was, why was this happening to her why why why whywhywhywhy-
“Stop!” she cried out, her hands balling into fists and hitting the bed on either side of her, with her left hand slamming onto the towel she had left for him and in the process tearing up his note. “Stop you stupid little girl!” she cried out again. “Just stop and shut up and listen to yourself! Why are you being so worried about a guy you’ve just met?! You idiot!”
“WHY AM I LIKE THIS?!”
Fire chakra fueled her arms as she felt heat begin to spark on her fingertips, desperate for something to burn burn burn so she could get rid of some of her anger. Burn burn burn burn burn burn burn-
And then she dropped onto the ground on all fours, all energy lost. “What’s wrong with me, acting like a child over some stupid emotion? I… I should be stronger than this…”
That had been an hour ago. Aizou sat at the table beside the huge window that led to her balcony, the morning sun striking into her room through the window and filling it with light. She was looking downcast at the table in front of her, the sleek shine of the mahogany mocking the loss of shine from her day after what had just happened. She looked at her left hand. There were some scrapes on it where she had accidentally slammed her hand into the sharp remains of her lamp while her right had been busy holding the phone she spoke with Hyouga through, and it was that small yelp of pain that had him immediately putting the phone down and rushing to meet her.
However, it had been an hour ago. She knew they lived almost painfully apart, with the Kouri clan compound almost pitifully away from the commercial districts of the village if only so they could practice their Ice Release arts in secret and safely, and without a sanctioned reason Hyouga had no excuse to travel in any way other than a civilian, i.e. using the painfully slow roads and public transport like any other civilian who couldn’t utilise chakra but needed to get somewhere quick had to do. But damnit why couldn’t he get here faster!?
God fucking damnit… Fucking hell Maigo.. What the hell was he thinking!? What the hell was she thinking, letting her emotions play her like that, so foolishly so naively so childishly. Fucking hell!
She stood up, both palms on the table as she felt chakra channeled through her body again. She wanted to let it out. She wanted to let it out. She wanted to let it out and make everything burn like she had burned his body. Like she had burned him in his sleep until he was nothing more than a crisp who couldn’t stop her from taking all his money… Burn burn burn burn burn burn burn burnburburnburn BURN-
Her left hand hit the table in a fist. Fucking hell. She was supposed to be stronger than this… She should’ve been able to survive alone… After all those years of being alone and having no one to count on but herself and her body she should’ve been used to surviving alone… So why was it that she could let others into her life so easily?
Shuuji… Hyouga… Maigo… It was just three people on her short list but that was already three people too many in her books! Too many! Too many! She shouldn’t even need one! She… She’d called Hyouga and he didn’t turn up. Maybe he was like them. Maybe he was like all the guys that she had seen in her life. Maybe Shuuji was the same. They all played her. The same way she played them. It was the only way things in this world worked. You were either playing someone for a fool or they were playing you. There was no different.
She dug her claws into her hands as she slumped back into the chair.
And this time, she was played.
Word count: 949/949
‘Stop,’ she told herself. ‘It’s… it’s okay. I’m sure… I’m…’
But no words came to mind. No self-comforting words came to mind. Her head dipped down and her tail drooped as she swallowed, her mouth dry and slightly agape as she came to terms with this. What was she expecting? One night of fucking and she was going to go ask him out? He was probably leaving to go have a drink with his friends and tell them how he’d bagged a girl, made her make a fool of herself, then left.
… She needed something… she needed someone to talk to. She needed support and she didn’t- Wait, was that something on the bed? She sat down beside the towel she had prepared for him and saw a small note, handwritten by Maigo himself if the signature at the end was anything. As she read it, her hands tightened around the piece of paper, but her stormy emotions didn’t calm down.
‘Leaving unannounced?’ she thought. ‘Dinner? Who does he think he is?!’
She didn’t know what to think. He had left. He had something more important to do and he- Why was she so worried about this!? She was Aizou Kitsuchi, she shouldn’t be- But she was, why was this happening to her why why why whywhywhywhy-
“Stop!” she cried out, her hands balling into fists and hitting the bed on either side of her, with her left hand slamming onto the towel she had left for him and in the process tearing up his note. “Stop you stupid little girl!” she cried out again. “Just stop and shut up and listen to yourself! Why are you being so worried about a guy you’ve just met?! You idiot!”
“WHY AM I LIKE THIS?!”
Fire chakra fueled her arms as she felt heat begin to spark on her fingertips, desperate for something to burn burn burn so she could get rid of some of her anger. Burn burn burn burn burn burn burn-
And then she dropped onto the ground on all fours, all energy lost. “What’s wrong with me, acting like a child over some stupid emotion? I… I should be stronger than this…”
That had been an hour ago. Aizou sat at the table beside the huge window that led to her balcony, the morning sun striking into her room through the window and filling it with light. She was looking downcast at the table in front of her, the sleek shine of the mahogany mocking the loss of shine from her day after what had just happened. She looked at her left hand. There were some scrapes on it where she had accidentally slammed her hand into the sharp remains of her lamp while her right had been busy holding the phone she spoke with Hyouga through, and it was that small yelp of pain that had him immediately putting the phone down and rushing to meet her.
However, it had been an hour ago. She knew they lived almost painfully apart, with the Kouri clan compound almost pitifully away from the commercial districts of the village if only so they could practice their Ice Release arts in secret and safely, and without a sanctioned reason Hyouga had no excuse to travel in any way other than a civilian, i.e. using the painfully slow roads and public transport like any other civilian who couldn’t utilise chakra but needed to get somewhere quick had to do. But damnit why couldn’t he get here faster!?
God fucking damnit… Fucking hell Maigo.. What the hell was he thinking!? What the hell was she thinking, letting her emotions play her like that, so foolishly so naively so childishly. Fucking hell!
She stood up, both palms on the table as she felt chakra channeled through her body again. She wanted to let it out. She wanted to let it out. She wanted to let it out and make everything burn like she had burned his body. Like she had burned him in his sleep until he was nothing more than a crisp who couldn’t stop her from taking all his money… Burn burn burn burn burn burn burn burnburburnburn BURN-
Her left hand hit the table in a fist. Fucking hell. She was supposed to be stronger than this… She should’ve been able to survive alone… After all those years of being alone and having no one to count on but herself and her body she should’ve been used to surviving alone… So why was it that she could let others into her life so easily?
Shuuji… Hyouga… Maigo… It was just three people on her short list but that was already three people too many in her books! Too many! Too many! She shouldn’t even need one! She… She’d called Hyouga and he didn’t turn up. Maybe he was like them. Maybe he was like all the guys that she had seen in her life. Maybe Shuuji was the same. They all played her. The same way she played them. It was the only way things in this world worked. You were either playing someone for a fool or they were playing you. There was no different.
She dug her claws into her hands as she slumped back into the chair.
And this time, she was played.
Word count: 949/949