You are not connected. Please login or register

View previous topic View next topic Go down Message [Page 1 of 1]

1Bodishea Empty Bodishea Wed Jan 29, 2014 9:46 pm

Katari Fantomusodo

Katari Fantomusodo


D-rank
Symbol: Bodishea 100px-Otogakure_Symbol.svg


Clan: Bodishea

Kekkei Genkai: Bunshi Yuukai (Molecular Fusion)

Elements: N/A

Specialization: S-rank Fuuinjutsu, D-rank Kuychiyose or Taijutsu

Location: Scattered (Otagakure)

Clan History: This clan grew out of Orochimaru's Otagakure, or Land of Sound. This clan has always been loyal to Orochimaru, which its most notable members being Sakon and Ukon of the Sound Five. When Orochimaru died, this clan secretly continued to grow. This clan has vowed to never join with Konoha. This clan looks to Orochimaru as a role model and like a god. Everyone in this clan despises Konoha and Uchiha clan members. They share the symbol of all former Otogakure members.
Kekkei Genkai Description: This kkg gives clan members the unique ability to break their bodies down to a molecular level. The two twins usually use this ability to share the same body but can also use it to merge with the bodies of others and destroy the host's cells from the inside. When the individual is in need of assistance, his or her twin can bring out some of his or her body parts to aid the individual in blocking or attacking. The twin's arms and legs can emerge from those of the individual's to increase the force and quantity to his or her physical attacks. If one injects the DNA of a clan member, then they can access the kkg of this clan and can learn the kkg jutsus of the clan.

Drawbacks: Clan members must take a unique special characteristic called Siamese, which can not be balanced out.
Siamese:
Clan members may only take Fuuinjutsu, Taijutsu, and Kuchiyose as specializations. They must take Hesitant (Specialization) as a Special Characteristic, which can not be balanced.
Hesitant (Specialization):
Clan members under NO circumstances can start in Konoha. If they join Konoha, they shall be exiled and hunted by the clan.
Members: Sakon/Ukon (Deceased)

Kekkei Genkai Jutsu:
Summoning:

Parasite Demon Demolition:
Siamese Splitting:

Multiple Connected Limbs:



Last edited by Katari Fantomusodo on Thu Feb 20, 2014 7:33 am; edited 4 times in total

http://beastlymit.weebly.com

2Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Thu Jan 30, 2014 6:33 pm

Katari Fantomusodo

Katari Fantomusodo


D-rank
I believe that I have finished

http://beastlymit.weebly.com

3Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Fri Jan 31, 2014 5:39 pm

Orochi Risu

Orochi Risu


S-rank
I'm not an expert, but I can give a few pointers.

1. Given that you use orochimaru in your clan's history...you should know my clan is the one Orochimaru belonged to (just saying)

2.the jutsu:

Rashomon is a canon jutsu, but you'll still need to give it a type, element, duration and cooldown. Also the rashomon resumoning would roughly speaking be a SS jutsu given the fact that I can assume it has all the strength of the normal rashomon.

The barrage of the almighty blades is way to powerful for a D rank jutsu, for examples of rank D jutsu I refer you to the jutsu library in the jutsu section of the main forum.

Same goes for opening of death door. These are jutsu's linked to eachother, which is inventive, but they are seriously overpowered for the intended rank.

4Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Fri Jan 31, 2014 6:18 pm

Bokuden

Bokuden


D-rank
Risu, please refrain from ever posting on applications that do not belong to you, if you are not staff with authorization in that section. This clan will be left for its section's moderator or a senior member of staff.

5Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Sun Feb 02, 2014 5:46 pm

Katari Fantomusodo

Katari Fantomusodo


D-rank
Bump...it's been a while since an official mod or admin looked at this clan

http://beastlymit.weebly.com

6Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Wed Feb 05, 2014 3:40 pm

Katari Fantomusodo

Katari Fantomusodo


D-rank
Just go ahead and archive this...

http://beastlymit.weebly.com

7Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Wed Feb 19, 2014 9:45 am

Shoutoko




D-rank
I'm terribly sorry for the wait. I must admit, this is a nice put-together of this Kekkei Genkai. Well done.

The one thing I see glaringly is that you can't have others acquiring your Kekkei Genkai. Even if it was done in canon, I don't think you can.

Kuchiyose: Rashomon - As a defensive summon, I'm not sure that it should have an ability to attack; since essentially this is equal to a B-rank defense, you could just make a "Kuchiyose - Rashomon" single-summon defense as opposed to having a chakra pool.

All your other jutsu seem just fine. <3

8Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Thu Feb 20, 2014 7:33 am

Katari Fantomusodo

Katari Fantomusodo


D-rank
Bump

http://beastlymit.weebly.com

9Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Thu Feb 20, 2014 9:30 am

Daremo




S-rank
Location|| This could easily just been Scattered with the exception of Konoha.

KG Description || The only problem I have with this is the possibility of others gaining the ability through injecting themselves with a clans member DNA – which in a battle can easily be gotten via cut. So remove the whole thing regarding it being gained by DNA injection.

Drawbacks|| You can remove the whole thing regarding them not being able to join Konoha. It's not exactly a drawback.

Rashomon || 150 chakra cost for a B-rank summons is incredibly high. Have the chakra cost be that of a standard B-rank technique(-20) and give the summons a maintenance cost (for a B-rank it's -15 per post). I suggest rewording the summons in it's entirety. For in one sentence you state “User has complete control of Rashomon” and in the following one you stated “Rashomon can't move.” Not only that you said it can only be summoned once per thread than later on you stated it's cool down being 25 posts. So yeah, rewording it will be better. I will gladly help you, anyone will, if you need help with this.

Siamese Splitting || Once dispel do the member gain by any remaining chakra from their twin?


Multiple Connected Limbs || State exactly what this does. You only told me it can shatter solid rock and break bones. So does this give a +1 to their strength? Or what??

10Bodishea Empty Re: Bodishea Thu Feb 20, 2014 9:40 am

Bokuden

Bokuden


D-rank
A note on Rashomon: It has been made on the site before, so an entirely new write up that differs from the already existing one would be redundant. The character that used the Rashomon gates was Nagare. Perhaps you should look him up.

Also, I thought we weren't approving SS-Rank clan jutsu. What happened? And how is none of this kkg medical?

Sponsored content



View previous topic View next topic Back to top Message [Page 1 of 1]

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum

Naruto and Naruto Shippuuden belong to © Masashi Kishimoto.