After the events of what had happened to Ryuto, he knew that he would never be the same again. He was traumatized by what he had witnessed happen at the hands of his father. He tossed and turned in his sleep, the vivid image of his father smashing his mother's face in with a cast iron skillet, and the feeling of her blood on his hands as he helped his father drag her body into the main room so that he could chop her up, haunted his dreams and he woke up throughout the night several times, never having had such a terrible sleep. He was terrifed to be in his own house, wondering if his father would turn on him next. He couldn't help but imagine that if he slipped up and did anything wrong, or possibly if his father found out that he was dating Misaki, he would come after him and it could be him who was in the fireplace next. The thought terrified him, but he currently had nowhere else to go. He and Misaki had seen one another a few times since their first fateful encounter, but he didn't want to burden him with having to deal with Ryuto living with him as well, but he also couldn't afford to get his own place. He was in a pretty terrible place, and he knew that there was a good chance that it would only get worse. He would have to keep saving up money until he could afford to pay for his own apartment, and in the meantime he would simply have to try to avoid his father as much as he possibly could...

While the day was quite lovely outside, Ryuto was feeling quite worse for wear, his hair an utter mess and his eyes completely red and puffy. After the events of the previous day with what his father had done to his mother, the sleep that he had gotten only served to make him feel more exhausted and it showed. He hadn't even taken the time to select a real outfit for his outing with the lovely Misaki today, instead wearing a simple white linen undershirt with his blue, purple and gold robes and cloak over top. It was still a pretty nice outfit, all things considered, but compared to the well fitted suits that he generally wore and the fantastic colour palate that he generally played around with, it seemed pretty boring and uninspired, which was how he felt today. He wanted to crawl into a hole and die, but he knew that he couldn't do that, as he had Misaki to think of now. He told the boy that he would be there for him always, no matter what, and this was one of those what days. He knew that he wouldn't be able to shake the pain and the depression that had come with what had happened the previous day, but he would do as best he could to be there for his beautiful flower.

He was sitting on a bench outside of the glass museum, where the two of them had agreed to meet a few days prior. Ryuto sighed, his face buried in his hands and his hair wildly falling all over the place as he waited for his ray of sunshine. He hoped that seeing Misaki would be able to at least distract him from what he had gone through, but he knew that there was a pretty good chance that nothing would be able to do so. The worst part was that he had no idea what he would tell Misaki when he inevitably asked Ryuto what was wrong. Would he tell him that his mother was dead? That his father had killed her? That he made Ryuto watch and help get rid of the body? Would he tell him that his father would likely kill him if he knew Ryuto and Misaki were seeing one another? He knew he couldn't tell him that last one, and he would have a pretty hard time to say anything else to him as well, but he had to tell him something, as he was approaching him right now...

709

The butterflies in his stomach never wore down. He had met with Ryuto several times after their first date (he still had a little bit of trouble calling them that. Even thinking of the word made him blush) and still Misaki couldn't get rid of the nervous feeling that always came before they saw each other. For the first time in his life, he felt self-conscious about what he wore and whether or not his scars were showing. He knew there was no way to hide the birthmark on his face - at least not one that he could afford - so there was little he could do about it. He tried to comb his hair, parting it towards the stained side of his face in an effort to hide it.

The outfit he wore had been painstakingly chosen for the occasion. After a few outings, he had gathered that Ryuto wasn't the biggest fan of his colorful shirts and baggy pants. So for the past few weeks, he had saved up some money so that he could buy something that he thought Ryuto might like. He ended up with a white button down shirt, its sleeves now rolled up to his elbows. The jeans he wore were tighter than he was used to, but they fit nicely. The girl at the store had said they made his legs look nice. He fixed the cuffs of his sleeves for the nth time. He kept on looking at himself in the mirror, wondering if this was alright. Nervous as he was, he knew that he couldn't keep stalling. Ryuto might get moody if he was kept waiting too long.

He slipped on a pair of worn formal shoes that he had also gotten at the secondhand store for the occasion. With a sigh and a mixture of nervousness and excitement, he left his apartment, but not before blushing as he caught a glimpse of an unfinished painting in the corner of the room. Twenty minutes later, he would arrive at the glass museum, where he and Ryuto had agreed to meet. He cursed himself, knowing he was late. Living in the slums made getting anywhere quickly rather annoying. Anything worth visiting was usually placed as far from the ruined neighborhood as possible.

When Misaki spotted Ryuto sitting on a bench, he smiled widely. The effects of seeing the other boy never lessened. The intense joy he felt was nearly overwhelming. "Ryuto-kun!" He called out brightly, while jogging towards the bench. In his initial excitement, he had failed to notice the bags under the other boy's eyes, the unusual way he was slumping or the red in his eyes. Once he did, though, his expression fell. It was uncharacteristic and unnerving. What had happened to make him feel that way?

His first thoughts were that he had done something wrong, that he had hurt Ryuto. He shook them off quickly, though. He couldn't help the other boy if he was worrying about himself. Now wasn't the time for that. He sat next to Ryuto. He tried to remember the things the other boy did for him when he felt sad or insecure. He sat down next to Ryuto and wrapped his arms around the boy's lean frame, so that his head would press against Misaki's shoulder. He held on to the boy tightly and reassuringly. "You don't have to tell me anything," he whispered in Ryuto's ear. "Just know that I'm here for you and I'm not going anywhere," he would reassure him, running his calloused fingers through locks of silver hair as gently as he could.

He wanted to be numb, he wished that he couldn't feel this pain. Misaki's smiling face, while being something that generally made Ryuto feel happy, couldn't even break him from his current state. He tried to focus on things that would make him happy, and he noticed that Misaki had gotten some new clothes. He looked nice, and he had tried so hard to impress Ryuto, and yet here he was, a slobbish wreck of a person, not even worthy of being in the presence of such a radiant person. He wanted to tell him he looked fantastic, more so he wanted to tell him he didn't have to cover the mark on his face. It was something that made Misaki unique, and one of the many things that made him beautiful. Ryuto's heart sank when the words wouldn't come to his lips, Misaki seeing his downtrodden he looked and moving up to embrace him. As he spoke into Ryuto's ear, he couldn't even say anything, and all he could do was clutch Misaki as tightly as he could, which admittedly was a little bit harder than he meant to, and bury his face into Misaki's shoulder. He didn't want him to notice that his shoulder was wet from Ryuto's tears, as Ryuto wasn't one to cry, or to really show much emotion in general. He wanted to be happy with Misaki, but right now, in this moment, there was no happiness left in his world.

He would stay that was for several long minutes, not letting Misaki go, not moving his head from his shoulder, not able to utter a single word. He tried to speak several times, but he was unable to find his voice. He wanted to tell Misaki everything, but he didn't want to tell him anything at the same time. He didn't want Misaki to share in his pain, as he thought that nobody should ever feel such terrible pain. He knew that Misaki had been through a lot in his life, and though Ryuto had never pressed him to find out more about the scars and what had happened to him, he also knew that Misaki didn't need more on his shoulders. He had no intent of adding to the hefty weight that the boy already held at all times; he couldn't do that to him. The silence killed him inside, and the turmoil that he was feeling was like a massive dark cloud raining down on him. He knew that he was currently the worst person for Misaki to be around, as he was feeling completely self destructive, part of the heavy coat being to cover the self inflicted wounds on his arms and legs, the pain giving him some release, though he knew it was in the wrong way. He didn't want to take it out on anyone else, and so instead he decided to take it out on himself, to remind himself that he was still alive, and to try to escape the deeper suffering that he was feeling, though all it had done was added to it.

Finally, after a few minutes, he was able to find his voice, or at least something that resembled it, more like a shadow of its normal self. It was broken and it was weak, but at least it was there. "I...I'm sorry...I'm sorry you have t-to see me l-like this...You shouldn't have t-to deal with m-my pain...You're so b-beautiful, Misaki. So perfect...I don't want t-to drag you down to hell with m-me..." He was still sobbing, but he tried to sound as strong and put together as he could, which he was absolutely failing at. He was glad there didn't seem to be many people around, the glass museum being fairly empty today. At least nobody else had to see someone so strong brought to such a pathetic state. When he calmed down a bit more, raising his head from Misaki's shoulder, he looked him in the eyes briefly. He knew that he was a pathetic sight, but Misaki's beautiful eyes helped to calm Ryuto a little bit, a half smile forcing it's way through all of the pain. He would give Misaki a soft kiss on the lips, the salty taste of his tears being an unfortunate side effect of his pain and something Misaki would have to taste as well. The kiss helped him center himself a little bit, feeling more at ease with the feeling of Misaki's soft warm lips against his, and he was able to ground himself a little bit more in reality.

"I'm so sorry, Misaki...You should never have to see me like this...You should not have to feel my pain...I promised I would always protect you, but how could I do so when I'm in such a state? I'm pathetic..." he would contemplate his next words carefully, deciding what he would say, and what he settled on made him feel sick deep inside his soul and his heart, the half truth killing him inside. "My mother...passed away last night..." That was all he could manage, another tear began to streak down his face and he looked down at the ground in shame, unable to bare the thought of what Misaki must think of him right now. He was such a pathetic wreck. He managed another forced smile, however, knowing Misaki would likely catch that it was forced, though he wanted to smile for him. "You look nice, by the way...You always look beautiful, no matter what you wear, but today you look extra nice..."

1684

He couldn't help but hold Ryuto just as tightly. Misaki had no idea what had driven the boy to this state, but that hardly mattered. He didn't need to know, nor did he want to force Ryuto to say something that he wasn't ready to. That was the last thing he needed right now. Together, they could try to make sense of this later. For now, all Misaki could do was hold on to Ryuto

With every sob that racked Ryuto's body, Misaki felt his heart break. He had always been quick to cry. It was something that he cursed himself for, especially now. Tears flowed freely from his eyes. He pressed his lips tenderly to the boy's silver hair over and over again. He kept threading his fingers through the silky locks of hair. He did his best to keep himself from sobbing. He succeeded, but he couldn't stop his own tears from trailing down the side of his face and landing on Ryuto's hair.

"Don't apologize, please." He nearly sounded like he was begging. Ryuto was already in enough pain. He didn't need to worry about what Misaki would think or about burdening him with his feelings. If anything, Misaki felt overwhelmed by the trusting display of vulnerability and emotion. The fact that Ryuto was willing to let his guard down around him... If only he could have realized that without it coming to this.

He wanted to say that he had been to hell, that he had lived there for a third of his life, and that nothing Ryuto could ever do would ever resemble it in the slightest. He wanted to say that he was far from perfect, that he was a broken mess of a thing, and that nothing he ever did would compare to the beauty and wonder that was Ryuto. He wanted to say that wherever Ryuto went, he would blindly follow, that he trusted the boy with all his heart and soul, and that he would do everything that he could to make sure that nothing ever made him cry like this again. The words didn't come out, however. "Ryuto-kun..." He whispered brokenly instead. At that moment, he would have given anything to see Ryuto smile.

Almost as if their minds were linked together, he looked down at him as Ryuto lifted his head from Misaki's shoulder. And despite the tears, the puffed up features and the obvious exhaustion, Misaki couldn't help but think that this boy was beautiful. Their lips were drawn together. The kiss tasted of salt and mild desperation, and like all their other kisses, it ended far too quickly.

At Ryuto's explanation of what had happened, Misaki's expression turned to one of understanding. He rested his hands on Ryuto's cheeks and wiped away his tears as best he could. Not knowing what else to do or say, he pressed their lips together again. Once they parted, he would rest his forehead against the other boy's. They stayed that way in silence for a moment, until Ryuto tried to make light of the situation by mentioning Misaki's clothes.

"I, uh, I guess I wanted to impress you," he explained. It seemed silly now. Nevertheless, he blushed at the compliment. "I think this is the first time I've seen you without a suit. I can't say you look any less handsome," he added, staring at the boy in garnished robes and a simple undershirt.

Maybe it was because he was feeling vulnerable that he said the words that were about to come out of his mouth. "I..." He took a deep breath. "I never met my father and my mother sent me away when I was about six or seven. She said she wanted me to begin my training and experience the world. I believed her, but now I see it for what it really was," he scoffed, unable to help his resentment. He had been so naive back then, thinking that his mother really had his best interest at heart. She had to have known what would happen, had to have known that he would end up broken, suffering and alone.

"She and her husband had had a baby boy. He never really liked me much, I think. He just... sort of put up with me because he had to. I got in the way of their perfect little family. They sent me back here and then I-" he felt the bile rise up in his throat. Flashes of torment invaded his mind in quick succession. The glinting edge of a knife in the low lighting. The sting of a whip crashing against his back. The metal bars of a cage, shrouded in darkness.

"If I don't acknowledge it, it never happened."

He took a deep breath to try to compose himself. "I haven't seen any of them since. Haven't heard a single word, either." Wherever his words had been headed originally had been lost and this was what he said instead.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is... things might seem hopeless now. You're in pain, but you can't let it control you," like he was one to talk. Anything that remotely resembled a tight or enclosed space sent him into a pathetic frenzy. He was scared of the dark and still had to sleep with a nightlight. It had been a year already and he still had nightmares left him in screams and covered in cold sweat. "It gets better. I'll make sure that it does. I'll make sure that you're happy again." It was a promise, one that Misaki sealed by pressing his lips to Ryuto's.

He was looking for happiness, or comfort, or something to drag him out of the pain and the darkness, the abyss that was currently his mind. His defenses were on full display, the iron prison of the fortress in his mind keeping him locked down tight. Misaki was a gallant knight, trying to rescue from Ryuto from the prison that he had been locked in by his tyrant father, a lot like the fairy tales of old. It was unfortunate that at this point it seemed to be completely impenetrable. He wanted to break out and go with Misaki, off to a place where the two of them could be together and safe, happily away from all of life's distractions. He knew, however, that it simply wouldn't happen right now and he would have to be patient. HGe just had to get over this awful self destructive hump without putting a Kunak through his eye and he would be able to be happy again. It was pretty damned tempting to take the kunai though...

As he stood in Misaki's arms, he tried not to seem too upset, hearing him talk about how Ryuto wasn't wearing a suit. He was kind but Ryuto knew that he looked like a slob without his regular garb, missing the feeling of the expensive wools and cottons touching his body, and the familliar feeling of a tie fastened snugly against his neck. Misaki would then do something that Ryuto didn't quite expect. He opened up to Ryuto about his past, telling him about his parents and how her father didn't seem to like him. He would stop himself from going too far, telling him instead that he hadn't seen or heard from them since he was small. He tried to cheer Ryuto up, telling him that things would get better. He wasn't actually sure if he was trying to cheer him up or if he was simply trying to say that he kind of understood where he was currently, but either way Ryuto could appreciate the attempt. When Misaki came to press his lips to Ryuto's, instead of breaking off like hee generally did, Ryuto held the kiss for as long as he could, not wanting the moment to break away, a torrent of emotions running through that kiss.

He thought of the moment he met Misaki, how he had felt so sure that nothing in this world could have been more predestined to happen than that random encounter. He knew instantly that this was the person that he wanted to spend his time with that he could make him happy. When Misaki realised that he felt the same way about Ryuto it made him very happy, as the two of them were able to move past the hump that was the uncertainty of Misaki's sexuality. Ryuto and Misaki had been together for a few weeks at this point, and it had been a fantastic time for the two of them, until last night had thrown a wrench in everything. His father had ruined everything for him, anbd he wished that he could turn back time to before it had happened and get his mother the hell out of that abusive bullshit. As he held Misaki he thought of all of the pain he had gone through, and tried to allow it to melt away with the beautiful kiss.

Misaki was his reason for living, the one thing that he currently couldn't live without. Misaki would get him through what had happened, and he knew it. Misaki was his everything, and although he hadn't said it yet, he knew that he loved the boy, and that was a dangerous thing. "Misaki...you are so beautiful. You are perfect, and I'm so glad to have you in my life..." He would plant another kiss on Misaki's cheek and smile softly for the first time in the whole day...

(666/2350)

Misaki could feel Ryuto holding on to the kiss for dear life. He kept their lips joined and even once they separated, he couldn't help but keep Ryuto as close as possible. He really wanted nothing more than to bring back the other boy's casual confidence, his easygoing and sly smile, his knowing gazes and self-assured expressions. He cradled Ryuto's face in his hands and gently ran his thumbs over his cheeks. Misaki shook his head. "I'm far from perfect," he said, trying to smile. It didn't quite reach his eyes. He wasn't used to being praised or complimented. He still did't know how to take such kind words. He rested his forehead on Ryuto's after the other boy kissed his cheek. "You, on the other hand... God, I don't think I've ever met anyone like you. You're just... You're so- so wonderful," he tried to elaborate.

Misaki had never claimed to be eloquent, but he was trying his best to get his feelings across. Embarrassing as it was to bear his heart out like this, he knew these were things that Ryuto needed to hear. "You always know exactly what to say to make me feel happy and wanted. You're charming and confident and- and you have the most amazing laugh. You're by far the most beautiful person I've ever seen in my life. You're always kind to me, you're always so patient." He kissed Ryuto once more, this time, the desperation was more obvious than before. It was the only way he thought he could get his feelings across. If words weren't able to do it for him, maybe this would.

He pressed his lips hard against Ryuto's. He held the other boy tightly and firmly, dragging as closely as he possibly could. He gently bit Ryuto's lower lip. His tongue brushed against those same spots, as if trying to ease any pain that he may have accidentally caused. It was obvious that he had no experience regarding relationships - physical or otherwise. Most of the time, he followed Ryuto's lead. The rest were mostly trial and error. Still, his kiss was unrelenting. When they finally broke apart, Misaki was panting and blushing a bright shade of crimson. Maybe that wasn't the smartest thing to do in public. Misaki was pretty sure that several people were staring at the young couple. "I'm sorry I got a little carried away," he apologized shyly.

Taking a deep breath, he slipped his hand into Ryuto's. "This might not be the best place to talk about these things," he began. He bit his lip nervously, not sure how to ask the following without coming across the wrong way, especially after his recent display. "We should go to my house... only if you want to, though," he added. In no way did he want Ryuto to feel pressured. If he agreed, he would gently guide the other boy to his house, making sure to always keep a firm arm around him. The message was clear. No matter what, Misaki had no intention of straying away from Ryuto's side.

Ryuto could feel the stone walls grinding down, the foundations beginning to crack. His focus in his mind was shifting towards the boy that he was with, and he could think only of him now. Misaki's long blue hair, his gorgeous eyes, the perfect pout to his lips that Ryuto simply couldn't get enough of. His beautiful words, spoken through a voice that in Ryuto's mind was akin to one of the great poets of old. He was moving towards happiness, the words that Misaki was speaking to him melting his pains away, and then when he would press his lips to Ryuto's again, he could feel the boy's need for this to work. Ryuto felt Misaki bite his lower lip, and felt his warm tongue brushing against it and his teeth, he had never been kissed in such a way before. He would, by simple reflex, part his teeth, allowing Misaki access to him as his tongue would seek to brush gently over Misaki's, the taste being not so much a taste, but simply a feeling of warm, something that he hadn't expected.

He pressed a little more into Misaki, getting lost briefly in the moment before coming back to reality and seeing the wandering eyes looking shocked at the two boys. He supposed that such public displays of affection were uncommon and generally unwanted, no matter the gender of the people engaging in the act. While people could possibly be intolerant of their sexuality, most people really didn't care. What they didn't like to see, however, was two people swapping saliva, and Ryuto couldn certainly understand why. Misaki would take Ryuto's hand in his once more, telling Ryuto that they should go to Misaki's house, something that Ryuto was kind of hoping to hear, as he wanted to continue his time with Misaki, who had taken him from the darkness and brought him a ray of sunshine. He had so many things he wanted to tell him, and he thought that it might be best to do it in privacy. He would press his lips to Misaki's once more for one last gentle short kiss, before speaking "Of course I'd like to come with you, it would be nice to talk a bit more privately anyway." He would follow the boy towards wherever it was that he lived, not knowing at all what to expect from him...

{Exit Thread}

2752

Jutsus Trained

Seal Transfer Jutsu - 750 words
Sly Mind Affect - 1000 words
Dusk Crow Genjutsu - 1000 words

2 words discarded~