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1Yatame Clan Empty Yatame Clan Sun Jan 24, 2016 1:53 pm

Yagatoma

Yagatoma


D-rank
Symbol:
Yatame Clan Latest?cb=20150206172619


Clan: Yatame

Kekkei Genkai: Sourugādian (Soul Guardian)

Elements: N/A

Specialization: Ninjutsu (Primary or Secondary)

Location: Scattered

Clan History: Long ago, when mankind was still young, the Dakuhanta were a race of very spiritual warriors. They were ethereal beings beyond the capabilities of man. These warriors dedicated their existence to absolute enlightenment as well as the pursuit of true knowledge and power. These almost nigh omnipotent beings knew the world was destined to be changed and transformed by mankind. Having lived and thrived for centuries, they also knew that their time was coming and that a new age would soon arise. However, not wanting their teachings to be forever lost to history, they sealed their would away inside an ancient tome. This tome was guarded by a door that only a true warrior could bypass.  Got centuries the Dakuhanta tomb remained hidden, seemingly lost to the sands of time.

However, during the warring states period before the creation of the shinobi village system, a rogue warrior by the name of Yagatoma Yatame would eventually discover the tomb after being wounded in battle. Succumbing to his injuries within the shrine, Yagatoma would die in a large puddle of his own blood. When he awoke he was in an all new place surrounded by large spiritual deities, the Dakuhanta from long ago were now before him. He was able to come to him by having died a true warriors death within their temple, unlocking the ancient tome.

The beings approached him, much larger than any human they spoke with deep booming voices. They spoke saying they had waited for many years for a warrior of worth to appear such as Yagatoma. They offered their warrior spirits to Yagatoma and his descendants for all eternity under one simple rule. The power granted to them by these "Guardian Spirits" could not be forced and must be given willingly by the guardian to the user or the user would be corrupted and destroyed by it. Yagatoma agreed and was granted what he would later call the Yatame seal. Afterwords he was returned to the world of the living, his wounds healed and his fighting prowess stronger than ever.

For years Yagatoma taught the youth of the clan how to befriend their guardian and master their new powers. Yagatoma was considered as a God amongst his people, having been the only one in the clans history to completely master his full potential. That was until fourth shinobi world war. During the ear another Yatame by the name of Kagan, also mastered the full potential of the demon and used it to divide the clan. After the wars end the clan remained  divided between followers of Kagan and those who still followed the old teachings of Yagatoma. Peace remained until conflict lead to a civil war from within the clan. The event that had started the war was Kagans assassination. The civil war ravaged the clan causing death tolls to drive the clan to near extinction. The Dakuhanta guardians were disappointed in their chosen warriors but, as time went on and the years passed, members of extraordinary potential began appearing. Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, the guardian beings remained loyal to the Yatame clan.

In the present day the clan still lie separated and scattered, but the teachings of Yagatoma have lived on giving new hope for a bright future. 

Kekkei Genkai Description:

Appearance:
Members of this clan can be distinguished from those around them if a close enough look is taken. They, for the most part, have shiny white hair and purple eyes with their pupils forming slits instead of circles. They also can be said to appear younger than they actually are although they age normally.

Soul Guardian:
The Dakuhanta are a race of warrior beings. These beings are spiritual entities from long ago and to this day even though they have different personalities like humans they all still follow a very strict code of honor, live by the sword die by the sword. They manifest now as voices within the Yatame clan members subconcious and also as ghost like apararions in their vision at times. The guardians using their spiritually enlightened power linked themselves to the Yatame bloodline. This grants each Yatame member a guardian deity from the spirit realm to guide them and through training, the bond between them can grow and grant strength beyond any other. These beings grant a number of abilities to their hosts.

Dakuhanta:

Increased Chakra pool
These beings are of a higher stature in spiritual terms. They have dedicated their existence to perfect spiritual enlightenment. The strong spiritual energy they carry has influenced the bodies of the Yatame clan members granting them a slightly larger chakra pool. (+10)

The Yatame Seal:
The Yatame seal is the link between the members of the clan and their spiritual guardians. Through this seal they are granted the ability to call upon the power of their guardians to aid them in battle. However due to their one rule set by the guardians, they have to train with their guardians to unlock more use to their power.

Level 1:
This level can be unlocked when the user is at least Genin rank and at this rank only minor advantages are granted. At this rank the users eyes turn dark red and a light blue aura surrounds them. In this form they expend 5 chakra per post and gain +1 tier to speed. They also gain the ability to sense chakra due to their heightened spiritual energy though this only allows them to sense where it is not who it belongs to or any other more specific details up to 10 meters. They also gain the ability to activate the spirit armor.

Level 2:
When a ninja of genin rank or above spends 1000 words of training with their guardian they can unlock this form. When in this form their eyes turn red and the blue aura returns but is much more potent in appearance than the previous forms. At this stage the user expends 10 chakra to gain +1 tier to speed, and the ability to sense chakra being boosted to 20m, as well as an added bonus. At this stage they gain access to the second clan jutsu the spirit blast.

Level 3:
Once the user is At least chunin rank and they spend 2000 words of training with their guardian they gain the ability to enter this form for 15 chakra per post. This from grants the same bonuses as before however the chakra sense is increased to 30m. They also gain access to the the second clan jutsu, spirit pulse.

Perfect Sync:
When the user reaches jounin rank and spends 3000 words of training with their guardian they gain the ability to summon all the power of their guardian and assume a new form entirely for 20 chakra per post. While in this form they take on the appearance of a smaller version of the Dakuhanta. Next they gain the ability to fly because of the wings they now have. However the wings don't flap meaning they can only fly to a max height of 60m and they fly similar to an airplane, which is like a controlled gliding that gives off an illusion of flight. As such they can only remain in The air for a max of five posts and they fly equal to their speed stat -1 rank. The bonus +1 tier boost remains and they can sense chakra up to 50m. Lastly they gain the ability to learn the clans strongest jutsu the full release.

perfect Sync:

Drawbacks:
Genjutsu/fuinjutsu: Due to the clans spiritual nature they take an added +1 rank of damage from all Genjutsu and fuinjutsu.

Restrictions: Due to narure of their link to the guardians it is difficult for them to form and train things of the same nature. This causes all summonings and senjutsu (including sage mode) to require +50% the word count.

Negatives:
The nature of the link between the spiritual energy of guardian and just causes fluctuations in the chakra of host which makes it harder to learn new jutsu and styles. Members of this clan must take the hesitant elements SC with no positives to balance.

Unnatural Chakra: Due to the clans unnatural chakra network medical ninjutsu used to heal them is decresed in efficiency by one rank while offensive medical ninjutsu used against them is increased by one rank

Members: N/A

Kekkei Genkai Jutsu:

Name: Spirit Armor
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D-A
Type: Defensive
Element: None
Range: Self
Specialty: Ninjutsu
Duration: (D-B) 5 chakra (A) 10 chakra
Cooldown: (D-C) 3 (B) 4 (A) 5
Description: By continuously expelling chakra from their body the user creates a suit of armor made of pure chakra. The armor grants highly advantageous abilities dependant upon the rank of the user. It allows the user to protect against jutsu of one rank higher, two of equal, three of one rank lower and all jutsu two ranks lower or more. Once the armor blocks the max number of attacks however it dissipates.

Name: Spirit Blast
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: C
Type: Offensive
Element: None
Range: 30m
Specialty: Ninjutsu
Duration: -
Cooldown: 4 posts
Description: Focusing raw spiritual energy to a focal point on the palm of the users hands. The user can create a solid ball of chakra, roughly the size of a soccer ball, that can be thrown at a speed up to 20m/s at a range of 35m The energy is solid and dense causing it to hit with blunt force and upon impact can cause major external brushing and possible bone fractures. The ball upon impact will also explode with concussive force capable of knocking anyone within 1m backwards up to 2m and causing light bruising.

Name: Spirit Pulse
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: B
Type: Offensive/Defensive
Element: None
Range: 10m
Specialty: Ninjutsu
Duration: Instant
Cooldown: 5 posts
Description: Focusing raw spiritual energy all around their body the user expands it outward quickly creating a concussive blast with them as the focal point. The blast expands outward to 10m in a single second. The blast is capable of repelling attackers sending them back 5m and causing serious bruising and broken bones. The blast is also capable of repelling jutsu up to 1 A-rank, 2-B rank, Or 3 C-rank. However once it blocks it's maximum limit the jutsu nullifies.

Full Release:

Name: Yatame Seal: Full Release
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: S
Type: Offensive/Supplementary
Element: none
Range: Self (12 inches from body)
Specialty: Ninjutsu
Duration: -15 per post (5 posts max
Cooldown: Double the duration(5 minimum)
Description: This is the Yatame clans strongest technique. By Focusing their chakra into their seal for one post they may activate the jutsu on the second post. Drawing their guardian spirits full power from the world of spirits to the human world the spirit grants the user all it's might. This form causes the pupils in the eyes to fade leaving nothing but white emptiness. The hair spikes p and turns blue and lastly a fiery like blue aura will flow violently from the user. The aura extends 12 inches off the users skin and while in this form the user is granted +2 endurance and their chakra based attacks have their strength increased by one rank. Lastly anyone with less than A rank endurance who touches the aura will suffer 1st degree tissue damage on the contact area. The form can be manifested for 30 chakra and costs 15 per post to maintain. The downside to the amazing power granted is that the body of the user cannot handle the power being forced upon it this cause a -2 tier decrease to all stats for 5 posts after the jutsu ends.



Last edited by Katsushi on Wed Jan 27, 2016 3:43 am; edited 9 times in total

2Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Mon Jan 25, 2016 6:55 am

Fukai

Fukai


D-rank
Hiya

KKG:

"However die to their one rule set by the guardians,"

I assume you mean 'due' instead of 'die'. Usually not picky on spelling but wouldn't want anyone think there was death implied in some way here.


"ability to sense chakra being boosted to 25m"

Would like this lowered to 20m as you shouldn't be outdoing the Hyuuga in sensory proficiency when that clan is based on sensory and yours isn't.


"At this stage the aura can block one C-Rank or two D-Rank attacks"

A toggle-able ability will not be able to be paired with this kind of defensive power, you are essentially giving yourself a way to protect yourself from most C rank and lower jutsu for little cost. If you want this defensive ability, I would like to see it in jutsu form at the bottom or reworked into a single cost defense that is in line with the jutsu guidelines. This may be something like a burst of aura or something that can protect you once every x posts for x extra cost. If you do it like this then I would like a description of how the defense works. Make this change for all the levels.


"chakra sense is increased to 35m"

Lower to 30.


"They also gain wings allowing them to fly with speed equal their speed stat."

I will let you have the current abilities for 25 chakra per post or flying at -1 rank in speed for 20 chakra per post. Also a description on the mechanics of how you fly. If you decide just to take the sensory and speed buff, I can give you 60m range at 15 chakra per post.


Drawbacks:

The drawbacks that you have are good, but you will need more of them overall. I would like one more active drawback and one more active or inactive drawback.

An active drawback is one that has an effect in battle such as your weakness to genjutsu, this could be something like a -1 to a stat or a disadvantage while your seal is active. An inactive drawback is one that does not, such as your hesitant SC.


Jutsu:

Spirit Blast:

How big is the ball?

"major external brushing and possible none fractures."
Seems kind of tame to me ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


Spirit Pulse:

Speed of expansion?

"capable of repelling attackers"
How? Knocking them off their feet, ect.


Soul Transfer:

Sorry, can't have a Susano'o


Overall, a well fleshed out clan with a lot of advantages. You just need to add a couple more disadvantages and smooth the edges down.

3Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Mon Jan 25, 2016 2:21 pm

Yagatoma

Yagatoma


D-rank
Changes requested have been made and them some

4Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Mon Jan 25, 2016 7:44 pm

Fukai

Fukai


D-rank
KKG:

Looks good to me


Drawbacks:

Sweet as


Jutsu:

Spirit Armour:

I assume that this is a maintainable jutsu. I also assume that when you mean "attacks", you mean jutsu. If "attacks" aren't jutsu then explain what the rank that you attributed to them means.

So as far as maintainable jutsu are concerned, they aren't really supposed to be blocking jutsu in a similar way to single use jutsu can. The only way I'd give this is if you made it so that the jutsu ends as soon as the max damage that the armour can protect against has been taken. Meaning that you can activate it for the upfront cost and maintain it to a time that it will absorb damage and then it will dissipate. Another way is that you simply pay the upfront cost and the jutsu is active for a set period of time. This way it won't cost a maintenance chakra fee.

Done in this way, this jutsu will be able to protect against one jutsu of one rank higher, two of the same rank, three of lower rank, and block against all that is lower. The maintainable costs for these would be 5 chakra per post for D-B and 10 for A.


"The blast is also capable of repelling physical attacks of equal rank or lower."

The same as above, does this mean jutsu? If so, it can block one jutsu of A rank, two of B rank, three of C rank, and all of lower. But you will need to add in that if it reaches it's limit in terms of what it can block, the jutsu ends.


"Duration: -
Cooldown: 2x duration (5 minimum)"

What is 2 * - ?


Okay as far as the strength of the Yatame Seal jutsu goes, its buffs are higher than a normal S rank jutsu, but your debuffs after it ends are quite hefty so that is okay as long as the jutsu doesn't last too long. I would like it to be a maximum of 5 posts duration with keeping the cost as it is. If you don't want the duration cap then lower the buffs and debuffs.


You are close, just gotta get the jutsu right and then I'll give you a 1/2

5Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Tue Jan 26, 2016 3:31 pm

Yagatoma

Yagatoma


D-rank
Changes requested have been made~

6Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Tue Jan 26, 2016 7:01 pm

Fukai

Fukai


D-rank
Jutsu:

Reformat Spirit Armour and say "This jutsu will be able to protect against one jutsu of one rank higher, two of the same rank, three of lower rank, and block against all that is lower." instead of listing out for each rank.


" along with E-Rank weaponry."

Can't block basic attacks with jutsu in this way, remove these.


"The ball upon impact will also explode with concussive force capable of knocking anyone within 3m backwards up to 2m and causing light bruising."

If you want to keep this additional effect, remove the 'keep hold of indefinitely', reduce the explosive radius to 1m and up the cooldown to 4 posts. The reason that the 'keep hold of indefinitely becomes a problem is that it is potentially abusable with a knockback effect, such as chaining them together. This was not such a big deal before as it was a plain jutsu that simply dealt damage.


Up the cooldown of spirit pulse to 5.


"Lastly anyone with less than B rank endurance or A rank strength who touches the aura will suffer 3rd degree tissue damage on the contact area and lose 5 chakra per post of contact."

With your other buffs, this is simply too much. Remove the loss of chakra bit and decrease the tissue damage to 1st degree. You can remove the strength check as strength wouldn't really stop you from taking damage. Also I would need to know how far this aura extends from your body.

7Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Tue Jan 26, 2016 8:15 pm

Yagatoma

Yagatoma


D-rank
Done and done

8Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Wed Jan 27, 2016 2:21 am

Fukai

Fukai


D-rank
Looks good, a final sweep and final changes:

KKG:

Add some more detail on what the spirits actually are, how do you interact with them? What are they like? This detail is simply so that if someone was wanting to join this clan, they would have enough detail to start rping.


Flying: make a max height of 60m for your full release flying range.


Yatame Seal: Change the classification to Offensive/Supplimentary. Also bring up the maintainable cost to 15 per post. This jutsu is jam packed but is balanced by it's drawback, just need to bring the cost up.


The rest looks good~

9Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Wed Jan 27, 2016 3:43 am

Yagatoma

Yagatoma


D-rank
Changes have been made~

10Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Wed Jan 27, 2016 4:33 am

Fukai

Fukai


D-rank
Okay!

1/2 Approved

11Yatame Clan Empty Re: Yatame Clan Wed Jan 27, 2016 5:13 am

Ayakashi

Ayakashi


S-rank
Yatame Clan 2ryk94o

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